Love, Lust or Limerence?

Like the new trend of Cutt Waters displayed on every shelf, it's easy to find someone who's attractive and checks all of our boxes on the outside, easy and straight to the point. But how do we tell the difference between these three overlapping labels when it comes to connection and the feelings we’re experiencing? Let’s break it down.

Love is an emotion that usually runs deep beneath the surface. It's forgiving, selfless and usually has a chemical reaction between a pair that creates an incredible bond. Lust, for the most part is only sex driven, nothing more than physical needs being met and requires no emotional or meaningful intimacy.  While limerence, is where things can get tricky. Limerence is when a person becomes obsessively infatuated with a person, the connection and even the sex all together.

Limerence can cause a person to live in a false reality, meaning a person doesn’t know the difference between what it is and what it is not. Limerence calls for emotional dependence on a connection that more than likely is one sided and can become dangerous and even fatal.

My advice for those dealing with love, lust or maybe feeling stuck in limerence is having healthy boundaries, healthy communication with your partner and regular check-ins with yourself and together. These are keys to long lasting connections and relationships. Sometimes it’s just better to keep things simple than complicated.

Do you need help navigating the nuances of love, lust, or limerence? I am here to help.